Thou Shalt Put on a Show

HOROSCOPE: Today's the day to take on that endeavor that you've been too afraid to try.

Eating a tomato it is.

Just kidding.

ADAM: You're going to put on a show?
ME: You know, I bounce around from theater to theater, and hope and pray that I'm going to strike gold every time. Why don't I just make my own gold?
ADAM: Because only the Earth can do that. It's geography.
ME: You mean geology?
ADAM: Whatever. Point being, you can't just decide you're going to put on a show and then do it. You're not Mickey Rooney, and I am not Judy Garland.
ME: You're not?
ADAM: Okay, maybe in the shower, but otherwise--

It's not like I'm completely naive to what it takes to get a production together.

Good people.
Lots of outside support.
A script people can get behind.

BETH: Money, money, money, money--
ME: Yes, I'm aware that--
BETH: Money, money, money, money--
ME: OKAY! OKAY!
BETH: And you have none.
ME: I got along just fine in college when I was doing shows without that much money.
BETH: That was because space rental was free. That's what's going to kill you. The cost of space.
ME: There has to be some way around that. How did they do it in Shakespeare's time?
BETH: They declared war on the theater owners.
ME: That's not completely out of the question yet.

I kept reading through scripts to find that magical work. It has to be something so momentous I can't help but push for it.

So far the stage version of Growing Pains and Fraggle Rock: A Media Extravaganza! are out of the running.

CARLY: Theater snob.
ME: I just want to wow people.
CARLY: Then quilt. Theater doesn't wow anymore.
ME: It could--give the right--um--
CARLY: Given a miracle?
ME: Yeah, one of those would help.
CARLY: I'd offer to lend my support, but I don't like to fail at anything.
ME: Can you at least work box office?
CARLY: For a show that's never going to happen? Sure. Count me in.

An undertaking like this means I'm going to have put everything else aside.

SHANE: Huh?
ME: Not you, sweetie. But you may have to act in it.
SHANE: Sweet!

This blog, however, has to go.

In its place, I'm going to document everything about what it takes to put on this show.

That's right--it's a brand new blog.

www.thiscantbetheater.blogspot.com

Get ready to be wowed.